TdlM / taskmaster

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121 rows where series = 12

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id ▲ series episode task speaker roots quote studio
1391 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike Alex with a ball 543 Morgana Robinson 71 bastard So I've got to find the little bastard.
1392 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike Alex with a ball 543 Desiree Burch 69 hell Where the hell would a ball‒would probably be in here?
1393 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike Alex with a ball 543 Desiree Burch 69 hell Okay, where the hell haven't I looked?
1394 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike Alex with a ball 543 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck I've just seen him, the little fucker, but I don't have a ball!
1395 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike Alex with a ball 543 Greg Davies 2 fuck I'm gonna give Morgana a bonus point for her attempt, before we even give her a score. You would think it was because you set a trap for Alex, which I really enjoyed and thought, "I'm gonna give her an extra point for that, it's so clever", but it's not. It's 'cause you called Alex a little fucker. ✓
1396 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Desiree Burch 69 damn I think I want it six, uh, damn it.
1397 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Desiree Burch 69 fuck Whoa, fuck! OK, sorry.
1398 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Desiree Burch 69 shit Oh, shit!
1399 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Alan Davies 68 shit Oh, look at all this shit! OK.
1400 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Morgana Robinson 71 bastard Guys, is this a wind... oh, you little bastards!
1401 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Oh, I've got no fucking gold.
1402 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Guz Khan 70 dick It was a very nice break from running around like a dickhead all day. ✓
1403 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Greg Davies 2 fuck Unlike Desiree who, er, shouted, "Whoa! Fuck!" ✓
1404 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Desiree Burch 69 shit Just really bullshitted that one. Did that come out all right? ✓
1405 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Paint a flattering picture of the Taskmaster in action 544 Morgana Robinson 71 piss But you're still a little bit pissed off, so hence the eyebrows. ✓
1406 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Pop the balloon 545 Greg Davies 2 shit I'm gonna give Morgana two points, and it's basically because Desiree really bullshitted her way to three points. ✓
1407 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Pop the balloon 545 Morgana Robinson 71 dick Ooh, missed by a bee's dick!
1408 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Pop the balloon 545 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Ah, for fuck's sake!
1409 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Pop the balloon 545 Desiree Burch 69 fuck What the fuck was that?!
1410 Series 12 12 An imbalance in the poppability. 96 Strike poses to represent a hobby, an animal, and a celebrity 546 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck No, for fuck's sake. ✓
1411 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 The most awesome square 547 Greg Davies 2 shit They seem like a great couple. Really got their shit together. ✓
1412 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 The most awesome square 547 Morgana Robinson 71 piss I know that, you know, you're gonna piss off a lot of people at home if you don't give me at least five points. ✓
1413 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Guz Khan 70 shit Oh, shit. I've got a friend.
1414 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Greg Davies 2 shit Yeah, this is more of your very, very eloquent bullshit. ✓
1415 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Guz Khan 70 ass/arse Do you have any arse bread?
1416 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse I do have arse bread!
1417 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Guz Khan 70 ass/arse She's well known for the arse bread. ✓
1418 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Guz Khan 70 ass/arse
ass/arse
Arse bread was on my face. That was arse bread you saw. ✓
1419 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Scale the mountain 548 Greg Davies 2 ass/arse I'm going to give the Arse Bread Tragedy... I'm gonna give them all five points. ✓
1420 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Work out the contents of the bags 549 Alan Davies 68 shit
shit
Oh, you absolute... shitbag. Don't know why the word "shitbag" came to mind.
1421 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Work out the contents of the bags 549 Guz Khan 70 shit
shit
All the things you gave me, it all is shit. Write "shit" down.
1422 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Work out the contents of the bags 549 Alex Horne 1 shit Shit, yeah.
1423 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Work out the contents of the bags 549 Desiree Burch 69 fuck Yep, that's what the fuck that is!
1424 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Work out the contents of the bags 549 Desiree Burch 69 shit And then this shit is actually, like, oatmeal... I don't know, death.
1425 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Paint the space hopper green 550 Guz Khan 70 shit Oh, shit, this is gonna be messy.
1426 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Paint the space hopper green 550 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck
hell
Oh, that's better. Fuckin' hell.
1427 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Paint the space hopper green 550 Guz Khan 70 shit I'd like to make this sound more scientific than it's about to be, but... we're just gonna make this shit green.
1428 Series 12 12 Oatmeal and death. 97 Paint the space hopper green 550 Guz Khan 70 shit Well, at this point, I might as well just get messy. Enjoy ourselves and shit.
1429 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 The most old-fashioned thing that you still use 552 Morgana Robinson 71 shit They don't make them like they used to. It's, it's built like a brick shithouse. ✓
1430 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 The most old-fashioned thing that you still use 552 Guz Khan 70 shit All the time, we're being bombarded with shit and opinions that be messing up your psyche and your emotional state. ✓
1431 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Copy Alex 553 Greg Davies 2 hell I'm sure you'll both be very happy together in Hell. ✓
1432 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Copy Alex 553 Desiree Burch 69 damn Damn it.
1433 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Make a sand bridge across the river 554 Desiree Burch 69 fuck How the fuck do I move that?
1434 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Make a sand bridge across the river 554 Guz Khan 70 shit 'Cause water's very fundamental to building sand bridges, ain't it? I'm sure that was on Countryfile or some shit.
1435 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Make a sand bridge across the river 554 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck I don't fucking know.
1436 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Film a thrilling sequence with a welly-cam 555 Victoria Coren Mitchell 72 pussy "I always said the pussy was dangerous."
1437 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Convey objects using shadows 556 Desiree Burch 69 bitch In this one, the house really decided, like, "We want this bitch out." So it turned on me. ✓
1438 Series 12 12 The end of the franchise. 98 Convey objects using shadows 556 Desiree Burch 69 hell Ooh, snake. Walk like an Egyptian. But there's snake down in Hell. ✓
1439 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 The best thing that has quite a few layers 557 Greg Davies 2 shit I'm giving a man who found an old wig in his attic five points. That's Taskmaster and if you don't like it, tough shit! ✓
1440 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Complete the course as slowly as possible 558 Guz Khan 70 shit Shit!
1441 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Complete the course as slowly as possible 558 Alan Davies 68 bastard Stop, you bastard! Stop!
1442 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Spread jam on toast in a really cool way 559 Guz Khan 70 dick And then when my colleagues came in, the kids would be like, "You're a dickhead!" ✓
1443 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Spread jam on toast in a really cool way 559 Guz Khan 70 dick So I was like, "Yeah, I'm like the coolest up there and everyone else is a dickhead." ✓
1444 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Spread jam on toast in a really cool way 559 Guz Khan 70 shit You see how I did that? Flicked it... ow, shit! That's not so cool but I burnt myself for real.
1445 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse The whole thing was a pain in the arse, this one, wasn't it? ✓
1446 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Guz Khan 70 shit The worst shit I've ever... ✓
1447 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Desiree Burch 69 fuck Fuck me in the face!
1448 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Guz Khan 70 fuck Who the fuck is Veronica?!
1449 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Guz Khan 70 shit
shit
♪ This task... is shit. Got four hours to get to the end... task is bullshit! ♪
1450 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Solve the riddle 560 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Oh, my god, you've only gone and fucking done it!
1451 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Get the most forks in your bucket 561 Greg Davies 2 shit I loved your song, which I believe was called "This Task Is Shit". ✓
1452 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Get the most forks in your bucket 561 Greg Davies 2 shit You don't think, uh, the song "This Task Is Shit" is going to hold up against that, no? ✓
1453 Series 12 12 The customised inhaler. 99 Get the most forks in your bucket 561 Greg Davies 2 Christ Jesus Christ! ✓
1454 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 The most elegant thing beginning with 'G' 562 Greg Davies 2 shit Victoria, listen, across this series you have been consistently a sensational bullshitter. ✓
1455 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Sit on a cake 563 Guz Khan 70 ass/arse Or what it looks like after my ass has smushed it to pieces?
1456 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Sit on a cake 563 Guz Khan 70 shit Oh, my god. Look at this shit.
1457 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Sit on a cake 563 Desiree Burch 69 damn Where's the damn cakes? Where are the cakes? Where are you hiding cakes?
1458 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Sit on a cake 563 Desiree Burch 69 fuck Oh, fuck you if that's the right answer.
1459 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Get the most balls in the net 564 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse You arsehole! ✓
1460 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Prevent Alex from scoring a goal 565 Guz Khan 70 shit Should I tell you how I knew he was gonna do it? 'Cause of them shit-flickers, that's what. ✓
1461 Series 12 12 Croissants is croissants. 100 Prevent Alex from scoring a goal 565 Guz Khan 70 shit Never seen him aggressive in his life, and then he blasted that door. I shit myself when I was sat there. ✓
1462 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Land the iron on the ironing board 568 Desiree Burch 69 fuck Fuck!
1463 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Land the iron on the ironing board 568 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Little fucker.
1464 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Sit on the red chair in the secret tower 570 Guz Khan 70 fuck Now I'm here in this chair and I don't know what the fuck is going on.
1465 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Sit on the red chair in the secret tower 570 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Fuck!
1466 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Make paper aeroplanes 571 Greg Davies 2 shit I know that you like this, this novelty bullshit, so convert it if you want. ✓
1467 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Make paper aeroplanes 571 Morgana Robinson 71 bollock
bollock
bollock
bollock
Bollocks. Bollocks. Bollocks! So close to not bollocks. ✓
1468 Series 12 12 A chair in a sweet. 101 Make paper aeroplanes 571 Morgana Robinson 71 bollock Bollocks... ✓
1469 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 The most ridiculous thin thing 572 Greg Davies 2 shit The concept's ridiculous. Is the hair ridiculous? I was trying to start a heated debate but no one gives a shit. ✓
1470 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 The most ridiculous thin thing 572 Guz Khan 70 shit ... Alton Towers in the summer, full of kids all shitting all over the place... ✓
1471 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 The most ridiculous thin thing 572 Greg Davies 2 shit On school trips, you've seen kids shitting themselves? ✓
1472 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 The most ridiculous thin thing 572 Guz Khan 70 shit Shitty Sajid. ✓
1473 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 The most ridiculous thin thing 572 Greg Davies 2 Christ Oh, Christ! ✓
1474 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Put up a shelf for the Taskmaster's snooker balls 573 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse Oh, you're an arsehole!
1475 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Put up a shelf for the Taskmaster's snooker balls 573 Greg Davies 2 ass/arse You turned it upside down. You called it an arsehole. ✓
1476 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Put up a shelf for the Taskmaster's snooker balls 573 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse Actually I think it was the ball I was calling an arsehole. ✓
1477 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Put up a shelf for the Taskmaster's snooker balls 573 Alex Horne 1 cock So Desiree was the slowest, 19 minutes with the cock system. ✓
1478 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Write and perform a 30-second jingle 574 Morgana Robinson 71 shit Scared the shit out of me.
1479 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Pass everything through the pipe and the pipe through everything 575 Morgana Robinson 71 fuck Oh, you fuckers.
1480 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Pass everything through the pipe and the pipe through everything 575 Victoria Coren Mitchell 72 shit Come out, you little shit.
1481 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Direct drawings using limited keywords 576 Guz Khan 70 bastard Huh? Ah, ya bastard. OK. Line. ✓
1482 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Direct drawings using limited keywords 576 Guz Khan 70 shit I think Vic was describing Shitty Saj from earlier on in that anecdote. ✓
1483 Series 12 12 The integrity of the product. 102 Direct drawings using limited keywords 576 Guz Khan 70 shit And the thing I remember about Saj when he shit himself on the log flume, he was smiling. ✓
1484 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 The best thing you have repurposed 577 Morgana Robinson 71 ass/arse Arse cream. ✓
1485 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 The best thing you have repurposed 577 Greg Davies 2 ass/arse Two points for Morgana's arse cream. ✓
1486 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 Make a popcorn necklace and do the right thing 578 Desiree Burch 69 Christ OK. Jesus Christ.
1487 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 Make a popcorn necklace and do the right thing 578 Alan Davies 68 shit Oh, shit.
1488 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 Make a popcorn necklace and do the right thing 578 Morgana Robinson 71 shit Aww, shitsticks. ✓
1489 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 Play and commentate on a socially-distanced sport 579 Guz Khan 70 bollock I've had my bollocks permanently damaged from this game, so...
1490 Series 12 12 A couple of Ethels. 103 Play and commentate on a socially-distanced sport 579 Guz Khan 70 bastard Outstanding player, but a dirty bastard.

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CREATE TABLE profanity (
   id      INTEGER PRIMARY KEY,
   series  INTEGER REFERENCES series(id),
   episode INTEGER REFERENCES episodes(id),
   task    INTEGER REFERENCES tasks(id),
   speaker INTEGER REFERENCES people(id),
   roots   TEXT,
   quote   TEXT,
   studio  INTEGER
);
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